Getting back to Imagery (See Imagery Part One), and my awesome imagination, I really paid attention to what I was thinking about as I read my devotions and how the Scriptures were speaking to me in this way.
Do you remember Vacation Bible School when you were little? It was so cool because there were coloring papers and cut outs of a certain theme like “God’s Love in SPACE” or “Rest in the Lord at the BEACH!” I loved that stuff! You could go hear a story from the Bible and the teacher would place lively felt figures on a felt background, and then you would get an ice cream cone on your way home. What fun!
But as an adult, there is no VBS (hmm sounds like fun though- I’ll have to google it!) but not unlike VBS, I embrace the way the Scripture unfolds in my mind as a storyboard. It’s like the passages are meant for me, alone. It’s kind of like when we listen to music, we might visualize the story of the song as we sing. When our emotions are engaged in praise songs we are in the moment with the Holy Spirit. We know God is with us.
Most recently I have been ruminating and worrying about the future. Will I ever be able to work again? Will I get sicker and need to have chemotherapy? Will I have enough money to live? What does God want from me and who does He want me to be, and how will I ever be that? On top of this, the verses I was reading in my daily scriptures were all about NOT worrying and how blessings come wrapped in trials, but even as I knew in my heart and soul that this was true, I couldn’t shake the fear. The description I gave when I texted my sister that I was “Tragically Pessimistic!”
One day when I was wrapped up in that negative commentary about my future, I took some time to listen to the soft voice of God, and started a list titled:
When I focus on God, these things happen:
The first item I wrote was
1. I allow Him to unfold my given life using the talents He gave me.
And this inspired the following Imagery in the small cozy room that we call the library/music room. I sit comfortably on soft pillows, hands at my side, legs crossed. I must shut the door because whenever I am on the floor the wieners think I want to play and pile on top of me with kisses. It’s hard to practice mindfulness when they are around! You should see it when I am trying to exercise! Nothing like noses and tongues on your face when you’re planking!
I start by defining my emotions in an effort to get to the facts of how I feel in this moment. I am in an emotional state where logic has taken a back seat to emotion or fear. Wherever I “am” in my own miserable mind, I try to name it- give it a label: Despair, Fear, a feeling of impending doom-and as I do, I look to my right and there is Jesus. He has come to meet ME, right where I am, in this awful messy place. I can’t stop myself from being in awe! I smile, even in my misery, both in my imagery and physically in my room and open my hands at my side in praise. Jesus’ hand envelops my child-like one as we begin to walk side-by-side along a path of soft dirt.
The sky above us is azure blue, a color I have never seen my sky to be. Directly in front of me is a beautiful dense forest filled with deep green and dark wooded trees and bright flowers. I can hear bird song and animal sounds from deep within, and the smell is mossy and earthy and sweet. The forest is so close to me, right in front of my face. I cannot take one step forward without running smack into a tree.
I’m puzzled. If I go forward I can see the thistles and burrs that threaten to mangle my arms and legs, but yet, I can hear the wonder that is up ahead, and I am not afraid. Holding Jesus’ hand fills me with love and joy and I feel Fear, Despair and Doom melt away. Jesus smiles and laughs as He watches me realize that I don’t care about the blocked path, I could stand here with Him forever. Here, in what was two seconds ago my messy, awful miserable mind.
I look into the eyes of the Lord, deep pools of love and calm. He takes my elbow and gently moves me forward a step or two as the forest melts away in sync with our feet. It’s clear that the forest wouldn’t budge without Jesus at my side. My only way forward is with Jesus, but frankly, unlike my real life, I would be perfectly content standing right where I am—forever! Nonetheless, Jesus and I continue to walk my path together, and the beauty of my life is astonishing!
As I open my eyes, I feel better. I feel lighter and more positive. I know the Truth and I make a commitment to believe God’s promise that I will never be alone in my life. I really need to trust Him. With the realization that He is always with me I can be perfectly comfortable with where I am.
“Then I realized that my heart was bitter,
and I was all torn up inside
I was so foolish and ignorant—
I must have seemed like a senseless animal to you.
Yet, I still belong to you;
You hold my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel’
Leading me to a glorious destiny.”
Psalm 73:21-24 NLT
I hope you can see how IMAGERY can help you to get out of “yourself” and challenge some of the untruths we tell ourselves. Don’t give in to wallowing in self-pity. Your IMAGERY doesn’t have to be about Jesus or Heaven, one of my favorite Mindfulness exercises is that image of being by a tinkling spring of cool water. In the heat of the sun, the water travels across and around rocks as I send each of my negative thoughts down the river on a leaf. You may want to try it, or any one of the following skills of DBT (Dialectic Behavior Therapy) IMPROVE.
Imagery– Imagine a happy time, hurtful emotions draining from you, very relaxing scenes, etc.
Meaning– Find purpose in a painful situation (Next Post)
Prayer- open your heart and/or turn things over to God
Relaxing- Breathe deeply, yoga, drink hot milk, take a bath, etc.
One thing in the moment– Do one thing and focus on it
Vacation– No phone, go to a park or beach, get a magazine, eat candy…
Self-Encouragement- “This too shall pass.” Cheerlead yourself! “I can do this!”